Erdoğan: Baltimore Blues

Dear international media,

I am writing to you to protest about your unenthusiastic, meagre coverage of the Baltimore riots. When we here in Turkey had some light commotion back in 2013 (the "Gezi Park protests" as you called it), you went apocalyptic with your 24/7 reporting, your constant news flashes, your live footage and your sensational headlines. I therefore find it quite unprofessional that you have failed to show the same fervor for the mayhem currently unfolding in Baltimore. Sure, there were 11 people (accidentally) killed and 8000 (self) injured whereas Baltimore has none (so far!) but what has that have to do with anything other than scoring cheap journalistic points? And, yes, Istanbul is the greatest city in the world, but Baltimore has also some scenic qualities. Surely there are a few pretty neighborhoods which can make for spectacular rioting background, worthy of global broadcasting. And with a little effort from your graphic & editing teams I am confident that your coverage can become the over-hyped infotainment it deserves.

Kind regards,

President Recep Tayyip Erdogan