Kim Jong-un: Penpals 4ever

North Korea may be known as the hermetic kingdom, its citizens completely isolated from the rest of the world, but this does not apply to its perky leader, Kim Jong-un, who is more than happy to maintain open lines of communication with other wordly figures by for example exchanging New Year's cards with the UN Secretary-General.


Dear Ki-moon, I am taking some time off from my busy schedule running the greatest country in the world to personally wish you a happy new year. Please know that although you come from that despicable bastard sham of a country that is soon to be crushed in shameful defeat, "South Korea", I do not hold it against you. Also, as a goodwill gesture, be assured that I will personally give you the heads up in case we are forced to finally bring about the total ruin of the Great Satan's lair, the tundra of desolation you currently reside in (also derogatorily known as USA). It would be indeed a shame to be nuked to oblivion. So have a packed suitcase with you at all times and never switch of your phone off. Best comradely regards, Jong-un

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