ABSURDUS apoPLEXUS

Guns and toddlers, guns and toddlers, Go together like drums and soldiers. This I tell ya, brother, you can't have one without the other. Guns and toddlers, guns and toddlers, It's an institute you can still shoulder. Ask the local sentry and he will say it's concessionary. Try, try, try to separate them, it's a NRA collusion. Try, try, try and you only come to this conclusion: Guns and toddlers, guns and toddlers, Go together like drums and soldiers. Feds told by the gu

It's one thing to live in a country in constant fear for your life (what with the 2nd highest homicide rate in the world) but it's quite another unacceptable thing to be both in fear of your life and deprived of your consolation sundae.

North Korea does neither minces its words nor cares for political correctness, which is quite expected; how else can you grab the headlines nowadays? Obama is thus described in a recent statement regarding the shut-down of the country's internet (and by the country's internet we mean Kim Jong-un's wifi) by American hackers as "reckless, like a monkey in a tropical forest". Which, come to think of it is kind of restrained for them, conjuring (bar the racial slur) inadvertently

We are delighted to inform that your name was luckily selected for an all-expenses-paid vacation to your favorite combat zone. Ideal for some stress release, your all-inclusive trip includes athletic activities like target shooting and trench building, a chance to discover the hidden hotspots off the Syrian tourist trail and a detox health menu of canned goods to flush all toxins from your system and replace them with some new ones.

We regret to inform you that Xmas is cancelled this year due to economic collapse. Also, isn't it more fun if we celebrate it every two or three years?

Ottoman revivalist and Turkey leader Erdogan met Morocco's King Mohamed IV in Istanbul on Dec.27th for an informal meeting as the latter was in Turkey for holidays. The King, although quite loaded even for royalty, is not one to make a splash arrival except when he does.

Women in Saudi Arabia are literally driving themselves inadvertently to jail. Via a terrorist court no less.

That Turkey's newly enthroned President is not that keen on criticism has become abundantly clear by now (what with the purging of the police and judiciary, the arresting of journalists and such), though now we learn that his wrath for anyone insolent enough to badmouth him extends even to high-schools. A 16 year old student was recently arrested for offending him in a speech he made. Also on the news: A 10 year old was sentenced to one year of community service for defiling

The Russians are a proud, noble people, willing to withstand innumerable hellish hardships heaped upon them by envious foreign powers, jealous deities or cruel nature (be that food shortages, internet access, currency collapse etc). All in solidarity with their awe-inspiring, czar-wannabe leader. Expensive vodka is not one of them.

Do not go gentle into being banned outright, New tech should post and tweet on any day; Host, host against Kremlin's blocking might. Though social networks know they're in for a fight, Because their sites have faced court rulings they Do not go gentle into being banned outright. FB pages that thought and planned a rally on site, And learn, too late, they're taken down, held at bay, Do not go gentle into being banned outright. And you, user, there on your tablet at night